How to be Magic

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Down the Rabbit Hole

Want to know how to do magic?

Well you don’t do it, you become it. You let it flow through your body like arousal, through your heart and from your toes to your spine and crown. It’s sensual and it dances through you and with you, in you.

You need to live the magic so that it runs through your everyday life.

Synchronicity is being in flow, in the Tao and when you are in that place, you are swept up in a magical river, and the river is also within you, the same will, same mind. Like merging with a lover. The air is sweeter and more alive and has more viscosity. The universe conspires to bring you what you need, because you are also the universe.

Yesterday I spoke about the Heroine’s Journey. The journey of the feminine aspect leads down the rabbit hole. It’s the tale of Alice in Wonderland. https://heroinejourneys.com/heroines-journey/

Today I found myself in an Antiques Market looking for a waistcoat and a pocket watch for my little girl who is becoming the white rabbit from Alice in Wonderland this week.

Keys were found for dusty cabinets and top hats and waistcoats discovered while we all smiled and flowed in the magical river. Everything was brought to us and of course we turned the corner to be invited to have tea in Wonderland. Where else would a white rabbit and a witch take tea?

This is the everyday magic that is present in our lives and it’s subtle and beautiful magic. It’s not an action, there is no force. It’s not waving a wand. It’s not a gross motor movement of the hand and it’s subtler than breathing. It’s at the level of blood moving through your body, of tiny processes that you are barely aware of and allow without force. It’s a happening and simultaneously an observation of the happening.

You become the same mind and heart of the universe.

That’s how you become the magic.

If you want to know how to find the river, then follow your curiosity, your desire, your bliss.

Freckles

The little things mean a lot to me, if I’m still and quiet enough I can find beauty and joy in small places. But I need to slow down and give it my full attention in order to savour the sweetness.

Today it was the clear skin of my little Celtic warrior child, the violet blue of her eyes and the freckles on her nose. Carrying the genes of all the strong women in my ancestry. I put down my phone and gave her my full attention and watched her blossom, entertaining me with sweetness and funny mannerisms.

It was in the freshness of the parsley I keep outside the front door because the rabbits dine heartily if I keep it in the garden. I could feel it injecting my blood with fresh vitamins and minerals as it always tastes sweeter when you’ve nurtured the plant and asked permission, it gives more in return. Just like people.

It was the ripe soft plum that I picked from the tree, still sunshine warm. The texture and taste changing with every bite.

It was the ability to hold a clients tears as they had held themselves rigid and strong for too long, showing them the strength of softness instead. To be fluid, vulnerable, held, accepted. I want more of that in my world. I will show the way.

It gives me hope that I’m leaving the next generation with softness and wisdom and empowered to change things. Small things done with kindness is how we will change. Slowly, many people making small changes. Softer, slower, more fluid and flexible. Expanding, loving, growing.

If you want beauty around you, create it.

If you want to be loved, love

If you want a better world, make your little bit of it better, join up with the others, be part of the tapestry.

If you want to be forgiven, show forgiveness.

If you want compassion, be compassionate.

Be powerful, don’t waste your creation.

Don’t support the others who hate and lie and fear, you will only create hate, lies and fear.

Don’t complain, create.

Grow yourself, grow your world, make it better, more loving, more beautiful.

New edit : – How to heal your life through Shamanic Touch

 

There is more to touch than the physical contact of skin, muscle and bone, there is also the often-misunderstood yet equally important energetic connection; a connection I use to touch people in a deeper, richer, way and open them to their own ability to heal.

I’m a body worker and shamanic practitioner and I’d like to show you an alternative to healing and relating to each other. Everyone possesses these skills; they are inherent to all humans, and with practice we could all become more adept to relating to each other and the world will be a better place.

I was one of those shy, quiet kids, I felt overwhelmed by the information bombarding my senses and would hide in my room and talk to my ‘imaginary’ friend. I could pick up on the subtle language that people were using, words almost seemed unnecessary. I also knew, without a doubt, that everything was alive; chairs, tables, clothes, toys, they all had feelings. While other kids were watching T.V, I was practicing how to move objects with the power of my mind and making sure my Barbie doll was not in an uncomfortable position, to me she was alive and could feel pain. It was a shock when I discovered that other people did not share my perception of the world. I was quickly shamed out of my “weird” behavior and “taught” how to fit in. It would be thirty years before I found someone else who was the same sort of “weird”.

The first time I met a Tai Chi master I understood what I sensed was not strange. For the first time in my life, I could really feel someone at all levels of perception. Someone was communicating to me in my own language, they were touching me with their energy, and when they held my hand I could feel them touch all of me. I knew I had finally found home. I was no longer an outcast, I belonged somewhere. For the first time, someone looked into my eyes and they saw all of me. When we communicated, I could feel a warm glow in my heart and stomach. My body was alive and our energy, the essence of who we are, danced and played and exploded in the space between us like beautiful multi-colored ribbons, tumbling together in the air, touching, communicating.

I spent the next ten years learning about my energy body, how to express energy, use it to heal, and to defend myself. I learned how to open up, how to close down, how to stay rooted and move it around my body. I became more confident and stopped hiding in my room and pretending to be like everyone else, no longer afraid to let my weirdness show. I learned that the very energy that created life, the chi that my master used to throw people across the room, was the same energy that could be used to heal someone.

I learned that, by current social standards, we are all weird, we all have an energy body, it just happens to be under-developed. I would love to open people up to this gift. If everyone could become aware and gain mastery over their life force energy, life would be so much richer. With instruction and practice everyone can learn to interact this way. Imagine a world where you can connect with each other in a profound way, able to understand and communicate, hold space and heal each other. Living with a deep awareness of your connection to your environment. Living fully, through all of your body and senses, being all of who you are. These are the skills I use to touch and heal. Shamanic healing is using this unseen energy to remove the things that don’t belong with you and return the things that do, pieces of a broken heart or soul fragment lost through trauma, as well as removing energy which has found a home in your body and does not belong.

Some people think I’m a body worker and just physically work skin and muscle, but for Shamanic healers there is a very subtle level where deep healing takes place. We sense how your energy body connects to others. Energy threads extend from your body and reach into the world, like tendrils of smooth ribbon, searching, connecting and bringing information back. When there is a blockage in your world, your energy threads can become tangled, lose their ease of movement. To smooth them it’s a bit like running fingers gently through tangled hair.

When I touch a client, I move my energy from my heart, down my arm and into my fingers. So that when they feel me, it’s not just the physical sensation of touch on their skin, but they can feel the essence of who I am and my loving, healing intention.

During the massage our energy fields communicate, my energetic ribbons extending from my body and gently touching theirs, silently asking questions, “How are you feeling in this moment? What do you need? How do you want to be touched? Where is the pain?

As I continue to work I might ask, “How do you show up in the world? What is holding you back? How do you relate to the people around you? How do you connect to your environment? What has hurt you? What do you need to heal?”

I can feel their response, my client’s nonverbal, energetic communication tells me what is blocked in their lives and how it is effecting their physical body. I sense their answers as a knowing in my body. This is in addition to the physical feedback I receive from touching tense, hard muscle with my hands and fingers.

As I work to release the tense blocks in their muscles and joints I’m also working to unblock the energy in their lives, for one mirrors the other. As I soften muscles with my hands, I’m also running along the meridians, the energy pathways in their body, following the ribbons of energy extending from their body into the world. I’m untangling conflict and the places they feel stuck. Uncovering the emotion or belief they need to release, in order to unlock their life and move forward.

People need to be listened to, this is how I know what is happening within a person. It could take many sessions of talking before people overcome their fear or shame of telling me what is wrong and what they need. At the soul and energetic levels there is no ego or shame, just honest communication. I use this information to respond to their needs. At the top level I can use old fashioned verbal communication to check that I have understood and listened, confirm boundaries and ask for permission.

So it’s not just rubbing and kneading sore muscles. So much happens unseen in this world. But it does exist and this is how you start to heal a person deeply, from their soul all the way through to their physical body. If you would like to communicate and connect at a deeper level, learning Tai Chi or Reiki can unlock this gift. It can open you to abilities you never knew you had, ways to communicate, heal and connect with each other. Unblock your life and move forward, make aware the unseen energy that exists in everyday life.

 

 

Three ways that Powerlifting Helped Me to Reclaim my Body and Take up Space in the World

 

 

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The first time I walked into a body-building gym I felt like all my internal organs were frozen with apprehension. I almost tiptoed in, internally apologising for my presence, trying to stick to the walls and curtsy around the exercise equipment. I did not belong in this place, all around me were men gazing into the mirror while flexing their biceps. Checking out their own pumped up muscles, they looked so sure of themselves. In comparison, I could barely look at myself in the mirror, I was not even sure what my body looked like from my neck down. I just did not want to know; I was pretty sure it was not pleasant. I was not ready to accept the truth.

I looked around the gym, searching for a place to hide, my eyes finding the instructional poster for women. A model in a leotard, tiny waist, big breasts, hair done and full make-up. It described, in detail, what you should do to get a ‘perfect body’. It was a token to decorate the woman’s section, even with starvation and six-sessions-a-week workout routine I would never look like that woman.

I never had a good relationship with my body, I was a plump kid. My mother struggled to show affection, so she would give me sweet things instead, but when I grew bigger she made it clear that I embarrassed her and I should diet. By five I had learned that my body was not good enough, by puberty I had learned it was a dangerous, shameful thing that existed for other people’s pleasure. I knew it was not safe to be a woman in the world and I was terrified that as I grew, my body would expand, grow breasts, and I would become visible and attract attention.

I stopped eating. I could punish my ‘not good enough’ body, stay small and tiny, invisible. I ate very little for five years, but my body still grew, I became a woman. All through my adult life, pregnancy, and motherhood, my body performed as it should. I had no love for it, it just existed.

So I found myself in the gym, and I had no idea what I was doing there, standing somewhere between fear and shame and a real feeling of not being good enough. This was where the beautiful bodies lived. The people that moved with grace, so sure of themselves that they seemed to own their space. These were people who could look at their reflection without smarting with shame and self-degradation.

Not only was I a woman, but I was an unfit woman in a bodybuilding gym. I did not qualify for entry.  The only thing that worried me more than my obviously unacceptable body was the thought of dropping a heavy weight on my chest and being pinned to the floor, slowly suffocating as my lungs collapsed. However, that was a better option than turning around and sprinting towards the exit, exposing my legging clad buttocks to the room. Taking a deep breath, I walked towards my new trainer with a smile on my face, pretending I was just fine. That was the start of my process, learning that my body belonged to me and not to society.

It has been several years since that first training session and I am pleased to say I have never dropped anything heavy on myself. There are safety bars and people acting as spotters to make sure that does not happen. This is what lifting heavy weights has taught me.

  1. My Body is a Good Body – I am a woman, and my body is a good body. When I look around I see other women, all with good bodies of every shape and size. We are all valid. My body is strong and healthy and it can lift an amazing amount of weight. Now I have another barometer to tell me how good my body is and it is not the weight on a scale, it is the weight on a bar. For the first time in my life, heavier is good. Instead of being told to weigh less, I know that if I exercise and fuel my body with good food I see results, and it has nothing to do with zipping myself into tiny jeans. Most day’s I wear Lycra and it allows my body to stretch and grow beyond the tiny box society has tried to squeeze it in. I no longer torture myself with smaller sizes, being less than I am in order to fit into small clothes and small spaces.

 

The first physical change I noticed were my shoulders began to broaden. I remember the mix of emotions when I tried on a fitted shirt and got my shoulders and arms completely stuck. First came a moment of shame, the familiar memory of being too big. Then I remembered that this extra chunk contained a good deal of hard won muscle. My shoulders were stuck, but this was different, as I tried to fasten the buttons, straining over my chest, I thought of the absurd situation I was in. Women spend a large portion of their life trying to conform to an impossible shape. It wastes so much time and energy and prevents us from doing the things that really matter, making changes in the world. The shirt was a metaphor for the constraint I experienced in life. So I took a deep breath, filled my lungs, expanded into my chest and shoulders, flexed my biceps, rounded my back and roared in frustration. A big deep, low growl. It came from the pit of my stomach, made up of all the words and anger I had swallowed over the years. Society and that shirt could go to hell. I ripped it off and threw it in the bin. I was done with playing small.

 

I learned that as I expanded into my back and shoulders I worried less about my boobs. They have always been big, even as a skinny 14-year-old, and attracted attention which I did not have the skill to cope with. I have stopped trying to hunch my back to disguise them. Powerlifting has improved my posture and confidence. My back is straight, my shoulders fall down and back, naturally. When I walk, I am now aware of moving, from my hips and shoulders, not trying to hide my breasts. I feel more confident and I am no longer ashamed to take up space when I walk and sit. I have had a lot of experience sitting on public transport, my legs together, back hunched over, and arms together, making space for a man next to me to sit wide legged with his shoulders back.

Many times I have moved out the way in a corridor or on pavement, almost apologizing for my presence, making myself as small as possible.

I had not realised how much confidence my wide shoulders and strong back had given me until I was helped out at a powerlifting competition, when a male competitor squared up and expected me to give way, I stood firmly and claimed my space in the hall. I learned that my body is a good body and it has a right to exist and take up space in the world.

 

  1. I am stronger than I ever thought possible – I do not mean just physical strength, but, yes, my body is better equipped to deal with everyday life. Heavy doors and bags feel lighter and I move with greater ease through my life. I know that I am better prepared for whatever life experience comes next. Strength is valuable in life and I can help others when they need it. I am valuable for more than my attractiveness, my worth is not based on a stereotype and I have more to offer. I am a woman and I am physically and mentally strong.

 

Strength is born through adversity and our ability to overcome it. Every time I feel the weight of a heavy load on my back, I have the fear of not being good enough, strong enough, or brave enough to stand up straight from a squat. Thinking, this time it might be too heavy, too difficult, I cannot do it. All of the negative self-talk that we use. Fear, not of failing, but succeeding. Fear of putting ourselves out there and showing up. I experience that fear every time I lift the bar, but I shut my negative talk up and allow my beautiful strong body to work. My body takes over and I stand up straight and I lock out the lift. When that happens I know I am stronger than my fear. I am capable of more than I thought possible. I have beaten my doubts and negativity.

 

My personal trainer keeps a log book of my lifts, on at least five occasions I almost had to start from the beginning. Back pains from an old injury, bereavement and broken ribs have all set me back and I have lost strength, I have had to return to training and increase strength, slowly, each week a little stronger that before. Life is like that; it is never a smooth uphill trajectory. I have learned that no matter how many times you experience a setback; you stand back up. Powerlifting has taught me that lesson. I am stronger than I ever thought possible.

 

  1. I am only as strong as my weakest part – I have several old injuries, and not just physical. I experienced a lot of self-doubt and low self-esteem before I started Powerlifting. The only way you can become stronger is by taking a good look at your broken places in daylight and getting some help to mend them. There is no shame in admitting you need help and support. I am stronger because I built a good support team around me and being strong enough to ask for help.

 

I learned that in the early days my back would give way under too much pressure, I had a weakness in my sacroiliac joint from an accident years before. With help and rehabilitation, I was able to make my back stronger and recover. For a long time, it was the fear of my back failing a lift and the resulting pain that would make me fail, not my back itself. I would not even try and give up too soon, talking myself into failure before I had started. My support group includes my trainers, chiropractor, counsellor, friends and family and an amazing team of fellow lifters at the women’s only gym where I train. We are a diverse and amazing group of strong women and we literally have each other’s backs.

 

Powerlifting is still seen as a male dominated sport. Women are discouraged from ‘bulking up’ and gaining muscle as it does not look feminine. Gaining muscle and confidence to be present in the world is one of the benefits of Powerlifting and is not a disadvantage.

How is feminine supposed to look? We are all different. My feminine has curves, confidence, strength, and most of all, it has freedom from restriction. I have learned how to reclaim my body through Powerlifting and grow and expand into the world. My body is an act of courage and rebellion, it exists for me and not for society. I have broken the mould.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Healing Through Shamanic Touch

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There is so much more to touch than the physical contact of skin, muscle and bone. I’d like to share with you a little about my work and how I use energetic connection to go deeper, to touch people without using my physical body, talk to them without using my voice, and open people to their own ability to heal without using pills.

I’m a body worker and shamanic practitioner and I’d like to show you an alternative to healing and relating to each other. Everyone already possesses these skills, they are inherent to all humans, some of us are just more aware of the unseen connections we form. With practice we could all become adept to relating to each other in this way and the world will be a better place.

Every now and again I slow a therapy session down so I can analyze what I’m doing on an energetic level. There are those who think I’m a body worker and just physically work skin and muscle, but for Shamanic healers there is a very subtle level and where deep healing takes place. We sense how your energy body connects to others, some people, however, are just not consciously aware of it yet. This connection is why it’s so important to be respectful of your energy and how it effects the people around you.

Every therapy session starts when a client is traveling to see me. That’s when I send out some energy threads and connect, gently, like an invitation, and ease them on the journey. I’m picking up on subtle information about how they are feeling, are they are rushed and stuck in traffic, and try to unblock anything in their way.

Looking through shamanic eyes, energy threads extend from your living body and reach into the world, like tendrils of smooth ribbon, searching, connecting and bringing information back to you. When there is a blockage in your world, your energy threads can become tangled and lose their ease of movement. To smooth them it’s a bit like running fingers gently through tangled hair.

When my clients arrive we have a chat and I very gently bring my energy closer, silently asking for permission to connect with them, quietly waiting till they feel comfortable and open a bit more. I need to be very transparent and show them, energetically, who I am and wait to see if they would like to connect. As they relax and open, I meet them and expand a little until we find a comfortable place, a place of trust, respect and non-judgement.

I expand my energy body around theirs, not unlike two soap bubbles merging together, and become very grounded. I provide a safe space for my client to relax, trusting that I can hold them for as long as we stay connected. Here they can relax and become fluid, creating a healing space.

The silent conversation between our energy fields continues as I start to connect physically, moving my energy from my heart, down my arm and into my fingers. When I touch them physically, my clients feel me, not just the physical sensation of touch on their skin, but energetically who I am as a person.

My energy body silently says, “I am here, this is how I feel. Is it okay if I touch you?”.

I wait for a reply energetically, watching for subtle signs to make sure I have understood, that their body is happy to receive the touch. I listen to their pulse and heartbeat, breath and sighs, feel their texture, muscle tension and the temperature of their skin, and watch their facial expressions, all ways in which I sense the language of their body.

As the massage continues our energy fields interact and I silently ask more questions, “How are you feeling in this moment? What do you need? How do you want to be touched? Where is the pain?”

Again I watch for subtle changes in their physical body as I respond to their energy body’s request. Clients may raise a painful shoulder up a fraction or turn their head and sigh to allow me access to their painful neck. It’s all non-verbal communication, a mixture of listening to their body and energy.

As I continue to work other questions my energy body might silently ask,

“How do you show up in the world? What is holding you back? How do you relate to the people around you? How do you connect to your environment? What has hurt you? What do you need to heal?”

As relationships become more advanced sometimes my clients silently communicate wisdom and their understanding of the world to me and I communicate my wisdom and teaching to them. This is how teachers can transmit information just by being in the same room. We don’t always need to talk or have a formal lesson. Clients will go home with knowledge of how to resolve a problem or heal themselves. It’s just because our energy bodies have had, for lack of a better word, a chat.

In this way my client’s energy body tells me what is blocked in their lives and how it is effecting their physical body. As I work to release the tension and blockages in their muscles and joints I’m also working to unblock the energy in their lives, for one mirrors the other.

Physical, mental, emotional, and energy bodies need to be listened to in a deep and exquisite way. This is how I know what is happening within a person. It could take many sessions of talking before people overcome their fear or shame of telling me, deep down, what is happening in their life and what they need. They may not even know what this is at a conscious level, but at this deep soul and energetic level there is no ego or shame, just honest communication. I can use this information to respond to their needs, my physical body soothing and listening to theirs and my energy body communicating and healing. At the top level I can use old fashioned verbal communication to check that I have understood and listened, confirm boundaries and ask for permission.

So it’s not just rubbing and kneading sore muscles. So much happens unseen in this world. But it exists and this is how you start to heal a person deeply, from their soul all the way through to their physical body.

How does this relate to you and how you operate in the world? With instruction and practice everyone can learn to interact in this way. Can you imagine a world where all your inner fears and emotions are easily understood by everyone around you? You would feel held and deeply seen and supported. By opening up your energy body you can connect with each other in a profound way, able to understand and communicate, hold space and heal each other. Living with a deep awareness of your connection to each other and your environment. Living fully through all of your body and senses, being all of who you are.

 

The banjo busker and the living dead

Today at the cross roads of Fore Street a busker was playing and singing blue grass. He was alive, taking his passion, the thing that lights him up into the open and showing who he was. It didn’t matter if he fluffed a few notes or his voice was a bit rough. That music was floating out of him like some sort of magic potion that brought dead people back to life.

Here was his vulnerability and here was his song, he was just being who he was and sharing his soul, his gift. It was priceless.

But the people walking past in their expensive shoes couldn’t hear the music, they were blocking it out because of fear. If they heard it, they might feel it and the heart they had been keeping locked up, the heart that had endured the job that they hated would start to feel again. That job that they mindlessly turned up to because for this precious week of the year they could enjoy a holiday. This was the golden week. It was here and it was too late because they couldn’t see the sunlight and they couldn’t hear the music, they couldn’t see the texture of the clouds or the way their children desperately wanted to spend time with them, to be seen, to play.

They were shuffling past like zombies on the way to buy something to numb the pain of living while dead and to make them feel worthwhile.

Nearly 1,000 people past by that busker. If they had each given him a £1 they would have all been so much richer today. What do people value, is being brought back from the dead worth a coin ?, pay the busker or the ferryman, choose life or death. Living while dead was never part of the plan.

As I stood there on the corner watching I wanted to give up on humanity. I could feel the tears well up and I wanted to walk away.

Then one old woman looked up and smiled, she looked me in the eye as if we were in on a secret. We could hear the music. There was hope.

A passing Welsh family who still had blood moving through their body picked up on the tune of ‘Land of my Fathers’ and stirred awake.

Welsh dad started to sing in harmony with the banjo busker, he had thrown out a line into the crowd and made a connection. There was hope.

It takes just one lifeline to make the change and awaken the people in the crowd. Voices connect, eyes connect.

Hearts start beating, feeling. They look up and notice the blue of the sky.

Hope.

Don’t give up

Don’t give up

Freckles, Plums and Parsley

The little things mean a lot to me, if I’m still and quiet enough I can find beauty and joy in small places. But I need to slow down and give it my full attention in order to savour the sweetness.

Today it was the clear skin of my little Celtic warrior child, the violet blue of her eyes and the freckles on her nose. Carrying the genes of all the strong women in my ancestry. I put down my phone and gave her my full attention and watched her blossom, entertaining me with sweetness and funny mannerisms.

It was in the freshness of the parsley I keep outside the front door because the rabbits dine heartily if I keep it in the garden. I could feel it injecting my blood with fresh vitamins and minerals as it always tastes sweeter when you’ve nurtured the plant and asked permission, it gives more in return. Just like people.

It was the ripe soft plum that I picked from the tree, still sunshine warm. The texture and taste changing with every bite.

It was the ability to hold a clients tears as they had held themselves rigid and strong for too long, showing them the strength of softness instead. To be fluid, vulnerable, held, accepted. I want more of that in my world. I will show the way.

It was the Celtic warriors wise and beautiful heart of her elder sister who gave me a hug and supported me when she went into full warrior mode.

It gives me hope that I’m leaving the next generation with softness and wisdom and empowered to change things. Small things done with kindness is how we will change. Slowly, many people making small changes. Softer, slower, more fluid and flexible. Expanding, loving, growing.

If you want beauty around you, create it.

If you want to be loved, love

If you want a better world, make your little bit of it better, join up with the others, be part of the tapestry.

If you want to be forgiven, show forgiveness.

If you want compassion, be compassionate.

Be powerful, don’t waste your creation.

Don’t support the others who hate and lie and fear, you will only create hate, lies and fear.

Don’t complain, create.

Grow yourself, grow your world, make it better, more loving, more beautiful.

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Dreaming

Day three of dreaming and another insight into my deeper darker unconscious.

My dreams tend to come in threes and occur around the first quarter of the moon when it’s around 50% illuminated. Half dark, half light like the yin and yang symbol. It’s a powerful time, maybe even more so than a full or new moon.

For me it shows me what is out of balance, where my fears are. How I’m really feeling deep down and brings the shadow into the light.

 

Last nights dream involved me leading some school kids through the secret subterranean tunnels under the cinema, through some toilets and out into the air. Going through deep hidden passageways. In one toilet I had found a family of rats which had just given birth and were in danger of being trodden on so I scooped them all up and gently placed them inside my jumper to take them to safety. In the in-between state of sleep and awake I could feel their tiny claws grabbing on to my skin.* I also returned to a former job again underground to finish some paperwork but was send on an errand by my long dead boss to gather ingredients to make a Jamaican fruit cake for a party.

I think I have pieced together all the information over the last few nights dreaming and I understand the messages.

Please don’t be afraid of your dreams and nightmares, they are an invaluable learning tool.

* In Shamanic terms it’s possible for negative energy to become attached to our energy body and feed from it. This causes loss of energy, depression and illness. The negative energy often takes the form of an animal/humanoid or other strange shape which clings to the energy body, In this case baby rats. It allows the Shaman to see the energy and remove it, removing the illness.

Shamanic healing is removing the things that do not belong with us and restoring the things that do. Bringing back a piece of a broken heart that you have left with a lover or a soul fragment that left your body through trauma. Returning you to wholeness and bringing back all of your pieces.

By journeying in the Astral planes and dream world I could see the negative energy attach to my body and I could remove it. I could also see the behaviour that attracted it. The dream world for me is a bit like bathing for my soul.

Disclaimer – This isn’t a political post, Its something much worse, it’s Spiritual

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I had a moment of grace and clarity this morning. Recent events in the political arena have been crazy, it feels like I’ve been dreaming that the whole world has gone completely mad.

I’ve been hoping and trusting beyond all sanity that it is going to come right. This morning I started to see a little clearer.

I’ve recently ripped up my business website, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Advertising and decided to start from scratch. It’s served me really well for five years but it’s time for a change. So I’m starting again.

I’m a Bodyworker and this morning I have been designing new pages for all of the different treatments I offer and I came to Lomi Lomi Massage. For those of you who have never experienced it, you are in for a transformation. Lomi Lomi Massage is based on ancient Polynesian Shamanic ritual. It’s potent and strong magic. One of the principles is based on Ho’o Pono Pono which translates roughly as being in right standing, putting things right within yourself and those around you, your community and the world. While I was writing about Lomi Lomi  I started to describe the path to Ho’o Pono Pono, which is simply I love you, I’m sorry. This is the strongest medicine in the universe. It needs to be directed inwards, towards self-love and forgiveness and outwards to everyone around you. Do this one thing and transformational magic will happen.

Everything that happens within is mirrored without. The Taoists also taught this, as above so below. Love yourself and you will be able to both receive and give love more deeply to others. So what does this mushy stuff have to do with the current political insanity ?.

Well in addition to me wanting to rip everything up and start again, I was directed towards this article by Dr Joe Vitale. http://www.wanttoknow.info/070701imsorryiloveyoujoevitale.shtml

It’s about someone who worked with the criminally insane. (You can see the parallel with the political system).Essentially following Huna Wisdom, we are responsible for everything that happens. If we change ourselves, this will be reflected in our external world as it is only truly a reflection of our inner projection. It’s uncomfortable to think we are responsible for everything.

Joe writes, “I know this is tough to grasp, let alone accept or actually live. Blame is far easier than total responsibility, but as I spoke with Dr. Len, I began to realize that healing for him and in ho’oponopono means loving yourself. If you want to improve your life, you have to heal your life. If you want to cure anyone – even a mentally ill criminal – you do it by healing you.

What if the political wave of change is just a reflection of what is going on inside us ?. Maybe we both want and fear change in equal measure. Maybe deep down we are not sure of what we want, maybe we have insecurity around lack in our lives or fear of people who have different beliefs. Maybe deep down we are just scared, confused and don’t like ourselves very much. Maybe we have manifested our own Donald Trump, the confusion, the lies and the back stabbing. Our reality may just be based on what is being beamed out of our own internal projector room. What if we didn’t just create the monster. What if we were the monster ?

It’s a big leap to go from blaming everyone else to taking full responsibility. By blaming others we are giving our power away and looking to them – government, organisations, leaders to fix the problem. I wonder what would happen if we stopped being so afraid of our own power, and that we might somehow get it wrong and mess it up ?. If we used our own power to work on the only thing we could, ourselves. Just maybe we would could load a different film tape and have a more pleasant perceived reality to watch.

In view of the political change, do you want radical change in your life ?, What are you afraid of ?, Are there parts of you which you find hard to love and reconcile ?, Do you need to love and forgive yourself and others ?. Please read Joe’s article, it relates to the crazy situation that we are going through at the moment and although the answers to these questions are for you, if you feel like sharing please post your response below.

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